Early in the Morning
by D.D. Casale
Summary: It’s Christmas time for Sawyer and Juliet. Find out how they went from h-bombs to presents under the Christmas tree.
1. Chapter 1

**Early in the Morning  
**by Andressa Casale

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Lost, I'm just a fan with an overactive imagination.

**Rating:** Rated T for some violence and strong language.

**Author's Note:** This fic is a response to **One True Forum**'s Suliet session's Secret Santa. I was supposed to write three fics, or a three chapter long fic, inspired in three of Laura Pausini's songs. So this fic goes to Laís, who picked the singer. This is my Secret Santa gift to **Laís**! **s2**

I'm not a native English speaker, and this fic has not been proof read. I did my best to keep this as flawless as possible.

**Song Choice:** Io Canto - Laura Pausini

* * *

**Chapter 01 – The happiness of those who wait**

_La casa tutta piena di mattina_

_The hose is full with morning delight_

When Juliet awoke that morning she felt the sunlight bathing her face softly as it filtered through the blinds. She did not open her eyes though, the feeling of comfort was too amazing to let go. She wished she could go back to sleep. The cold air surrounding her was teasing her, taunting her to keep looking for refuge into the sea of covers. But just as she was getting back to sleep, she felt his lips on the back of her head.

She smiled with her eyes still closed, she chuckled. He inhaled the smell of her hair, and she felt the delicious sensation of pleasure racing her heart beat. There was no way in hell she was going to go back to sleep now, as his hands started to room over her body, sliding inside her pajama shirt. She felt the tingle of his rough fingers caressing her belly softly.

It was magical. She wondered why that morning felt so good. They had been living on that house now for the past six months, but that bed had never felt so good. And then it hit her, it was Christmas eve.

Every second she was feeling the more awake as he begun to press his body on her back. Letting her know the morning had made him ready for her. He needed to have her, and she felt so happy to be constantly on his mind even on his sleep.

"James, what if I was asleep?" She tried to pretend that it was bothering her, when it actually felt so good.

"I can tell when you're asleep," his whisper tickled her and she turned to face him him, loosing herself into his arms.

…**FLASHBACK…**

_L'odore del caffè nella cucina_

_The sweet smell of coffee in the kitchen_

He had asked for two weeks the first night they got there. He didn't know why he cared that much about her. Usually she was the first one he would point fingers at. He thought he hated her, but there he stood, practically begging her to say because he needed her. And he didn't know what he needed her for. Why she had become so important to him in less than forty eight hours.

Apparently, she had also been surprised when he admitted that he needed her. That he wanted her to stay. And surprisingly enough she agreed to stay. And they never spoke about her leaving again. And she never actually ever left. She stayed, stayed for six months. And they've gone from totally suspiciously of each other, to having each other's back, to friends, to confidents, and to… What exactly he didn't know!

That was why he was there, at eight o'clock in the morning, with the smell of her crappy coffee hanging in the air while he listened attentive to her babbling. But no, they didn't live together, they weren't a couple, they were just really good friends!

"And then Amy told me her nephew's birthday was coming up, and she wanted to give him a book," Sawyer watched as the sun lovely sparkled in her eyes as she spoke. "I suggested Harry Potter, she looked at me like I was crazy."

Sawyer chuckled, feeling the need to stroke her cheeks because she looked so cute, but he was too damn afraid of crossing some kind of boundary, he spoke instead. "Harry Potter is not a book for children!"

"So you read Harry Potter, huh?"

"Course I did, sweetheart, it's a shame we'll never know whether Snape is the bad guy or the good guy." And then he added as an extra thought, "or maybe we will thirty years from now!"

"Did you trust him?"

"Not at first, I didn't, but then I realized not everything is black and white." Their eyes locked for a moment, and suddenly Snape's loyalty to Dumbledore wasn't what was being discussed anymore. Sawyer cleared his throat. "What other books do you miss reading that haven't been written yet?"

She thought for a second. "You'll mock me!"

"I won't, Baby Spice, scout's honor!"

She smiled sheepishly before answering, "I would love if I could get a copy of Olivia Joules and the Overactive Imagination." He chuckled for the second time that morning. "You promised!" She whined playfully.

"You know… I love that book, I thought it was funny." He said and Juliet stared at him for a few seconds, and then she burst out laughing. "A cool sexy woman working as a spy, what's not to like?"

"Oh, my God! You read chick-lit!" Juliet couldn't stop laughing, the thought of Sawyer reading chick-lit was amazingly funny.

"Not any chick-lit, I'll have you know, only Brit Chick-lit!" He defended his male proud.

But it only made Juliet laugh even harder. Her laughter was the most beautiful sound, it was exuberant, and it was a contrast to her collected and cold façade. He had never realized before, how much he loved the way her laugh rang deep into his soul.

…**END OF FLASHBACK…**

_L'impronta di una testa sul cuscino_

_The head print in a pillow_

They lay in bed just gazing into each other's eyes, neither of them spoke, but their eyes were rambling on in a silent conversation. Because that's how it'd always been with them, sometimes words weren't of need.

Suddenly they heard a desperate wail coming from the baby monitor. Sawyer smiled, "my turn," he said and moved to get up leaving a head print on his pillow.

Juliet propped up on her elbows and watched as he put on his boxers. "Aren't you cold?"

"A little," he answers turning around to face her, "and quilt looking at my ass!"

She laughed wholehearted as he left the room. She decided to get up already, soon the kids would be running around the house. The cold was unbearable, so she put on a robe and sat on the couch next to the big window. She stared out adoringly.

…**FLASHBACK…**

_Il primo raggio che verrà_

_The first ray of sun that will rise_

"So," Juliet said as they walked through the dark jungle, "where are you taking me?"

"We're almost there, close your eyes," she did as he told her, and he held her hand guiding her carefully. "You can open your eyes now."

When she opened her eyes she found herself in beautiful cliff, the sun was rising in the horizon, the view was spectacular. The sky was pink colored, it was a magical moment, with the sounds of the morning and the smell of dew. It was peaceful, perfect, breathtaking. Juliet found herself speechless. And she was still holding his hand though it was no longer necessary.

"It's Christmas eve," Sawyer explained, "I thought we could celebrate."

They sat down on the grass, Sawyer started to take things out of a basket. "It's our second Christmas together."

"All though we completely forgot the first one, will all that time travelling thing going on." He gave Juliet a sandwich. "You know? I've never been a fan of Christmas."

"Not even when you were little?" She asked with curiosity.

"Not even then. My father used to get drunk on the holidays. It ruined Christmas for me, my parents were always yelling at each other. He never even once played Santa for me."

"I used to really love Christmas!" She told him with a smile. "I believed in Santa Claus so much I once got into a fight at school because the girl told me he wasn't real. That was when my parents had the talk with me. You know, 'grow up!'" He loved when she opened up to him like that, even when it made her uncomfortable. "What do you miss most about Christmas? You know, back when you were in the land of living!"

"I don't know…" He answered thinking. "I guess what I miss most is the snow!"

"I've never seen the snow!" She confessed.

…**END OF FLASHBACK…**

_La neve che si scioglierà correndo al maré_

_The snow will melt and find the sea_

Juliet was lost in thought, looking out of the window, when Clementine came running into the room, startling Juliet slightly. The seven year old girl climbed up in bed and started jumping up and down giggling. Her hair was straight and long, chestnut colored, and she had her father's dimples.

"It's snowing!" Sawyer said, which made Juliet look in his direction.

He stood by the door frame holding their 14 month old baby boy in his arms. The boy had big blue eyes, with little blonde hair in his head, his cheeks were chubby and pink it matched his full lips. But the cutest thing about his face was his slight chin dimple, that was as delicate as his mother's.

"Of course it's snowing," Clementine said still focused into spending the energy she recovered from the good night of sleep, "it's Christmas eve!"

"Well, Lola Bunny, auntie Juliet has never seen the snow."

"Never?!" Clementine stopped jumping to stare at her father's wife.

Juliet smiled getting up, she walked towards the girl, she put her hands on Clementine's waist, who knew that it meant Juliet would give her a boost and help her jump higher. And that's what the little girl did, she jumped.

"Never," Juliet said and Clementine jumped again, loving the play, "ever," she jumped again, "ever!" This time Clementine jumped off the bed, with Juliet's hand for support, the girl pretend she could fly.

But then Juliet laid her down on the floor giving her a tickle attack.

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_Le pietre di un sentiero di collina_

_The stones in the way that leads to the hills_

It was Sawyer's suggestion, a walk in the snow. Juliet held JJ in her arms and watched from the corner of her eyes as Clementine stumbled on a rock along the way, but didn't fall. Sawyer noticed Juliet's gaze. Vincent barked contented in front of them, snow was something new for him as well. Juliet felt JJ's wonderful baby smell, she brought him closer and kissed his forehead.

"You're overprotective!" Sawyer said smiling.

"I'm just watching her, making sure she's fine," she said back. A cold breeze sent shivers through Juliet's body. "Of all the things I imagined about snow, unbearably cold wasn't one of them."

Sawyer chuckled shaking his head. "Well, Goldie Locks, there's something you need to know before I let you run around in the snow."

"Yeah, and what is that?" Juliet asked.

Clementine giggled and answered, "don't eat yellow snow!"

At that very moment Sawyer bent down to make a snow ball and threw it at Juliet. "That's not fair," she complained, "I'm the one holding the baby!" Another snowball hit Juliet, but this time it was Clementine who threw it.

Father and daughter highfived, they laughed as Juliet scowled playfully.

…**FLASHBACK…**

_Lo sguardo di serenità_

_The look of pure serenity_

Juliet and Sawyer were talking for more than half an hour, still watching the sun rising, she was resting her head on his shoulder, they were holding hands with their fingers entwined. Sawyer was amazed at how much she was opening up to him.

"I hated my teen years," she confessed.

"Who didn't?"

"I was such a dork, so socially awkward. And kids are really mean. I hated going to school. You know? I thought about killing myself a lot of times."

"But you didn't!" He stressed every word. "And that's what makes you so special, it would have been easier to just kill yourself, but you faced your problems, you chose the hard way. You chose life! You're strong, Juliet!"

At that moment she looked deep into his eyes, he was caressing her hand unconsciously, making invisible patterns on her skin with his thumb. Then they both felt awareness surrounding them. And when she closed her eyes he followed the lead, completely sure that he wanted her. Sawyer captured her lips with his.

Her lips were soft, different than anyone else he ever kissed before. And when she opened her mouth her sweet taste drove him crazy. That moment was special, Juliet special. And it felt so right, so much so that Sawyer wasn't scared to admit that he was really falling in love with her.

…**END OF FLASHBACK…**

_I passi lenti e incerti di un bambino_

_The slow and uncertain steps of a child_

Their laughter never stopped now that they were building a snowman. Sawyer was knelt on the floor and Juliet was lying down with her head resting on her hands. She watched proud as JJ pulled himself up and struggled to walk in the snow. The scene brought a dazzled smile to her face.

That was definitely going to be the best Christmas she ever had.

Vincent barked, waving his heavy tail frenetically. The dog started to pull at Clementine's coat, trying to get her attention. The girl's content giggles were poetry. Juliet smiled happily, Sawyer noticed it and gave her a peck on the lips.

"Eeeeewww!" Clementine said, they both laughed.

Sawyer got up and started to chase a giggling Clementine. Juliet watched them amazed by the girl's capacity to giggle. And that's when she felt two cubby and tiny hands on her face. Juliet smiled at her son who smiled back at her. She had never been happier in her entire life.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two – ****You can't put a price**

**Author's Note:** So, last chapter was way too fluffy for my liking. I do like fluffy, I just don't know if I write good fluffy. I still don't know how I feel about last chapter. But this one is angst, this I have experience with. If you are an Alanis Morissette fan, you will recognize the lyrics of This Grudge in the beginning of this chapter.

**Song Choice:** El Valor Que No Se Ve – Laura Pausini

* * *

**…FLASHBACK…**

_Desconfías de la gente, del amor, y piensas que no es posible que se sufra más que tú!_

_You are mistrusting of people, of __love, and you think there's no one who can hurt more than you do!_

Fourteen years, thirty minutes and fifteen seconds. That was how long Juliet had known Edmund Burke before the moment he turned the key and unlocked the front door of their house. She first met him when her father invited him to stay over the night before some important business trip.

Edmund was in his early thirties, and was kind of attractive, especially for Juliet and Rachel, who were seventeen and twenty years old respectively. And then Juliet married him right after she graduated from college. At first they were blissfully married, but Edmund begun to work really hard and would usually come home really late.

Then she started to feel other women's perfume on his clothing, but when she questioned him about it, he would just change the subject and tell her she was being silly. That night, though, he had clearly crossed an invisible line. They had been attending a charity event when Edmund started to flirt with other women right in front of her.

He completely humiliated her, in front of all of their friends, and that night she intended to confront him.

That was how long she had known him until she heard the sound of the keys banging together in the silence, it was four in the morning and the moon was still shinning over their heads as he put his hand on the small of her back. In a way that said ladies-first. In a way that said you're-mine. She was his possession and he cared little about her feelings.

But as soon as they were in, she started her tirade. Did he think she was stupid? Did he not feel guilty? How log had he been sleeping with other women? Did he not know how humiliated she had felt? Did he not care about her? She kept going on, they still stood in the hallway, her voice started to fail, and tears were threatening to spill. But he just stared at her, maybe he had nothing to say.

"Are you PMSing?" She was stunned by his answer.

"How dare you?"

"Relax, Jules, I'm just lighting up the mood." He laughed and started to make his way up the stairs. "You were rambling on and on and your face was all red, you looked like a cartoon ready to explode with anger."

Juliet was shaking with anger after that comment. "You can't treat me like I'm just you possession. I have feelings."

"Come on, Jules," he said with his back to her," I'm tired, let's just go to bed!"

"Don't call me that, you son of a bitch!" She yelled, and he turned to face her.

She did not recognize the look on his face, and it scared her somehow. "I won't let you talk to me like that!" He yelled back.

"And I won't let you treat me like a piece of garbage!" She held her head high.

And then his hand was on her cheek. His forceful slap was shocking, unexpected. And it stung. She brought her hand up to cover the spot on her face that still throbbed painfully. She stared at him. One minute ago she believed to be feeling betrayed. But now she believed she had never known the concept of betray before.

In a fit of anger she tried to slap him back, but his reflex was quick, and he held her wrist. She tried to break free from him, but he twisted her arms behind her back, pulling hard on it, because he knew it had been dislocated a couple of times. He held her tight, pressing his body against her back.

"Let go of me!" she was begging him, it was not an order.

She felt his evil grin on her skin as he kissed her neck. "No!"

"Please, don't!" She begged again, in a low whisper, the rush of fear making her shed the tears she earlier fought so hard not to.

But he simply enjoyed the way she begged him. It all happened so fast, and Juliet was glad that it didn't take long. Maybe she was numb, just waiting for him to be finished. He had his way with her, right there in the hallway. When it was finally over, the sun was rising. He hit her again, this time harder, with his hand clenched into a fist that split her lower lip making it bleed.

She finally let go of her pride and cried. "Look at what you made me do!" He said as she sobbed. "Say you're sorry!"

"I'm sorry," she said whipping her face.

"Good girl!" He kissed her lower lip tenderly as if it was a reward for good behavior.

**…END OF FLASHBACK…**

_Busca una salida, un mañana que dé una nueva vida a todo el mundo que luchará con fe._

_You try to find an escape, a tomorrow that will give a new life to those thfat fight full of faith._

Juliet and Clementine were decorating Christmas cookies in the kitchen, but Juliet's thoughts were elsewhere.

"Auntie Juliet, you didn't answer me." Clementine's complain brought her back to the present.

"Sorry, honey, what did you ask me?"

"Why is Santa Claus so special?"

Juliet didn't know how to answer it, she thought for a moment and then smiled. "I guess it's because he bring us hope!" Clementine smiled.

…**FLASHBACK…**

_Hay días en los que la vida se llena de porqués, la esperanza se preocupa por quererlos resolver._

_There are days that make you wonder all the time__, and you lose faith when you look so hard for answers._

Juliet sat down at the sand watching the sun rising in the horizon. Her back hurt like hell. The tears poured down her face, unwanted. She looked up when she noticed Richard standing beside her. He had pity written all over his face, she did not like that. But she still could feel the hot on her skin as it branded her like a cattle.

He sat down next to her, and that was enough to make her lose the little control she still had, she was sobbing hard soon after. And he stayed silent as she cried.

"What are you doing here, Richard?" She asked, her voice still altered, she tried to wipe her face in vain. "I mean, haven't I been through enough already? Do you think I wasn't humiliated enough earlier?" Richard didn't answer, he wasn't used to this Juliet. In fact, he hadn't once seen her crying before. "Do you want to embarrass me more by watching me cry like a baby?!"

"I don't think less of you because I've seen you cry, Juliet!" He answered coldly. "In fact, it makes you more human."

"And who are you to talk about human? How long has it been since you stopped aging?"

Richard looked down defeated. "I'm not fine with Ben's decision." He confessed facing the floor. "I'm angry at his decision. Jacob is not going to like to see his brother's mark in a scar on your body."

"What does Jacob care?"

"He does care, Juliet!" Richard said somewhat offended. "Jacob is a great man… And I know what Ben wanted to achieve with this."

"Why did he do it?"

"Because he is afraid of you."

"Why would Ben be afraid of me?" Juliet asked tired of being dragged into this mess. She looked straight into Richard's eyes.

Richard did not look away, "I have known you since you were a tiny little baby. I even changed you dipper once!" He smiled joking, it made Juliet blush. "You are important Juliet!" Richard stressed the word important. "The things you are able to do. It scares the hell out of Ben."

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_Equivocarse nunca importa, vuélvel__o a intentar. Si una puerta se te cierra, otra puerta se abrirá._

_Past mistakes__ don't really matter, as long as you try again. When a door closes, another one opens._

Sawyer woke up with a start, the memories of the incident still fresh in his mind. How had he let that happen? He remember being mad as hell at Juliet. How could she just through all they had away because in the wrong moment he looked at someone else? Why had he even looked at Kate? Sawyer didn't know for sure!

He stumble out of bed, he was feeling so weak his legs could barely support his weight. His body ached, it was sore, but there wasn't even a mark on him. What hurt the most was the emptiness inside his heart. He could not stop thinking about Juliet. The fact that he was alone in a luxurious hotel room scared him.

He looked around him, the room felt hollow, and it matched his mood. He found a laptop on a desk, even though he had no idea what he was doing he managed to get access to the hotel's wireless internet. He looked up her name, but found nothing. It worried him, because he thought that Juliet was famous in her field, she should have a couple of published articles available on the internet.

He searched her ex husband, but found out he had never been married, and was on the list of the most eligible bachelors. How was that even possible? The guy was damn ugly.

Next he tried her maiden name, but all he could find was an article about cancer survivors, and an interview with Rachel Carlson. He read the interview worried, and apparently, Rachel had been an only child.

When the phone rang it startled him, he stared the piece of technology, it was alien to him. He had lived in the seventies for far too long, he didn't like technology! He pressed the bottom to accept the call.

"Yes," he said simply.

"Hey, it's me." Her voice was shallow, but he recognized it right away.

"Dammit, Kate. What the hell happened?"

She took a long breath. "You're alive!"

"Damm well I'm alive!" He yelled, he needed to yell at someone, especially at Kate. If she and Jack had never gone back to the island, then none of that would have ever happened. "Why are you calling me, Kate? I want nothing to do with any of you."

"I'm sorry, but I need your help..."

He didn't answer right away, he was thinking about why he was even giving her attention, but somehow, if she needed help, he couldn't just ignore her. "Help with what? You want me to help you run away from the feds?"

"Jack is gone, he never existed. Neither did Hurley." She explained close to tears. "We must have done something that changed the timeline."

Sawyers attention turned to the laptop's screen, where Rachel's article could still be seen. He needed to think of something to bring her back.

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_Y te sientes tan perdida que ya no puedes más sin la fuérza que te da la vida._

_And you feel so lost it's__ hard to keep on going without the strength life gives you._

Juliet felt her body throbbing with pain, she didn't know where she was, but she didn't want to open her eyes and find out. She didn't want to wake up from her comfortable slumber. But it was too late. She felt something warm and damp on her face. It felt like a dog, Licking her awake.

When she opened her eyes confused she stared at the face of a beautiful yellow Labrador. And then reality hit her, she was alive.

Her last concrete memory was of big blue eyes, and a bloody male face, begging her not to let go. But she did, because she loved him, loved him more than her own life. The rest was a blur, she remembered a rock, she remembered dying.

"_Vincent!"_ She heard someone calling. _"Where are you boy?"_

Vincent barked as if answering, Juliet wanted to make him stop, she didn't want to be found, she wanted to be left alone. But as she blinked her eyes rapidly trying to adjust to the light, she recognized the figure standing right next to her.

"Walt?" Her voice was hoarse, as if she hadn't spoken for an eternity.

"Dr. Burke!" Walt answered surprised to see her. "You're alive!"

"It's been a really long time since anyone called me that." Juliet said sitting up, putting her hand on her forehead, trying to make the headache stop. "How in the hell did you get so big?"

"I was seventeen when it all happened."

"What happened?"

"You changed the time line!" Walt explained seriously, he kneeled down to be on her eye level. "Jack told me what happened. That you set off the bomb."

"Jack is here?"

"Yes, he doesn't exist either."

"What?!" She asked in a high pitched tone.

"We don't exist! You, me, Jack, Hurley! We were never born in the real world."

------------

_Lo que en realidad importa es no renunciar jamás_

_What really matters in the end is to never give up_

Sawyer sat on the passenger seat as Kate drove in silence. Patsy Cline song "I've Loved and Lost Again" was playing on the radio. Sawyer smiled ironically. He looked out of the window, trying hard not to think about Juliet.

"I'm sorry I went back for you."

"Let's cut the crap, Kate!" He said annoyed. "You and I both know you didn't come back for either one of us who got left behind."

"I went back for, Claire…" She confessed close to tears. "I wanted to make things right and I just made a bigger mess."

"Gee, ya think?!" He said rudely. He sighed deeply. "It was not all your fault."

"You really loved her, didn't you?"

"I didn't just love her! She was the one." He looked deep into Kate's eyes. "And it's all my fault she's gone!"

"We'll find her, Sawyer!" Kate promised. "We'll talk to Eloise, I'm sure she will tell us what to do next."

"I hope you're right!" He said and stared out the window.

**…END OF FLASHBACK…**

_Cure las heridas que hay dentro de tí, lucha p__or vivir, con ese valor que no se ve._

_Heal those wounds inside yourself, fight for life, __with the strength you can't put a price._

"Daddy," Clementine cried out running into the living room, Sawyer looked up from his book. "Look, I made cookies!" She showed him a plate full of cookies.

"Wow, you made them all by yourself?" He asked getting one from her plate and taking a bite.

"Nope, auntie Juliet helped me make them."

"No wonder I almost cracked my teeth…" He said playfully.

"_I heard that!"_ Juliet yelled from the kitchen.

Sawyer smiled, getting up. "Ok, let's put these cookies near the Christmas tree for Santa, with some Alka Seltzer."

"Ok!" Clementine said smiling at Juliet who had come from the kitchen as well. "Do you think Santa will bring me all the things I want?"

"I don't know, peanut. What'd you ask for?" Sawyer asked her, turning on the Christmas lights.

"I asked for a cute white bunny!"

"Oh, no, no, no!" He said feeling kind of scared. "You don't want white bunnies. Never, do you hear me?"

Juliet laughed at the inside joke, the girl stared at her waiting for some explanation.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter ****Three – Just that Beautiful**

**Author's Note:** Yes, this is the last chapter. It was a three chapter challenge, nothing less, nothing more. There will be an epilogue though. I think this is my favorite chapter so far.

**Song Choice:** Bellissimo Così – Laura Pausini

* * *

**... FLASHBACK ...**

_Battezzo i miei danni con la fede in me senza illudermi_

_I'll accept my mistakes and __I'll have confidence in me, I won't be naive._

Juliet awoke that morning with something pressed against her body, or rather someone. Her whole body ached, at places she never even thought possible. Slowly the memories of the night before started to come back to her. Her father had brought a work college to sleep over since they would go on a business trip in the morning.

His name was Edmund, he was charming and kind of sexy. He was a smooth talker, and his field of expertise intrigued Juliet. They had stayed up late, long after her father and sister had gone to bed. And he had convinced her to sip some wine, he promissed he wouldn't tell her father. And then...

"Oh, my God!" Juliet whispered looking at Edmund's hairy arm holding her tight.

Juliet had slept with her father's acquaintance!

Sundenly she felt sick. Oh, my God? Could it be that she was pregnant? Don't be silly Juliet, you those simptoms take weeks to show up, if ever. How could she had been so stupid? She had never done something like that. She had been a virgin before that night.

Juliet got out of bed carefully not to wake him. She needed to be alone, she needed to think things over. She needed to think about the consequences. She made her way out of the bedroom, closed the door silent behind her. But just as she looked up from the floor, she found father.

He was stending right next to her, with his arms crossed and a dispointed look on his face. Juliet felt herself blush instantly.

"I hope you learn from your mistakes, Julie!" He said sternly and walked away from her and into his room.

**…END OF FLASHBACK…**

_Sono trasparente, lo sai, io quando parlo di noi quasi indecente._

_I'm an open book, you know, when I talk about __us I'm almost obscene. _

Juliet and Sawyer lay awake that morning, the snow was falling heavily outside, she had her head on his chest, feeling the calm rise and fall of his chest as he stroked her hair gently. The air was cold around them, the heat from each other's body was comfortable, soothing. James was whispering sweet things, telling her how much he loved her. And all she could do was smile and tell him that she loved him more.

She was almost falling back to sleep when the door of their room opened and Clementine came running inside.

"It's Christmas morning!" She yelled happily standing next to them.

"Do you think Santa brought something for me?" James asked excited.

"You never know if you two stay there kissing!" She said tapping her foot on the floor. Juliet laughed at the little girl.

**…FLASHBACK…**

_Spezza le parole di chi non t'ama e ti dice si_

_You shouldn't mind the words of those who tell you they __love you when they don't_

Juliet and Walt tracked through the jungle in silence. Vincent walked in front of them smelling the ground, determined to protect them from any danger.

"Walt," she broke the silence, "I'm sorry for what I've done to you!"

"It wasn't your fault, Dr. Burke." Walt smiled at her, "it was Ben's idea to put me in room 23."

"Yes, but I was the one who dragged there. I treated you like a prisoner."

"You were also the nice lady who made me grilled sandwiches when I stayed at your place." She smiled at him. "You held me when I cried. You let Zach, Emma and me stay up late watching movies. You made us popcorn!"

"I wanted you kids to have a normal life."

"I know you did." He agreed. "You made my stay at the barracks bearable."

Juliet smiled. "Don't tell Emma and Zach, but from the three of you, I liked you the most."

"Thanks!" Walt smiled embarrassed. "You were a mother figure to me. My mother never had time for me, with her career and her boyfriend."

"I'm glad you feel this way. But it still doesn't make it right the fact that I treated you like a prisoner."

"We were all Ben's prisoners!" They smiled at each other. "I know the things Ben put you through, the things he said. I know about your mark."

"Then you know what it means?"

"Yes, it means you belong to Esau." Juliet agreed with a nod of her head. "It's what it says not what it means!"

"I know!" She whispered as they arrived at a beach. "Jack!" She called his name when she saw him in the distance.

"Juliet, thank God you're alive!" He said from the four toed statue he was standing next to.

Hurley was there as well, and so was Richard. She walked towards them. Hurley hugged her like he really meant it. "Dude, we thought you had blown up like Arzt!"

"Nope, here I am all in one piece!" She said laughing, and then worry came to her. "Where's Sawyer?"

"It's kind of complicated." Jack said scratching his head.

"Sawyer is fine," Richard explained calmly, "and so is the rest of them. The problem is the four of you. Who in this timeline don't exist!"

"What do you mean by that?" She asked confused.

"It means what it means. You, Juliet, was the only one with enough power to change the timeline and you did it. You saved the lives of so many people. You're a hero."

"But what about us?" She asked looking from Walt to Hurley, to Jack.

"Jacob would like to talk to you about that if you don't mind," was Richard's answer.

------------

_Vieni a me come sei fallo immediatamente non voltarti mai_

_Come to me __right away even if you're imperfect and never go away _

Sawyer observed quietly the huge pendulum in the basement of a church in Los Angles. The only DHARMA station built outside of the island. Having worked as head security, he knew about this place all too well. He knew that it was built under a pocket of energy similar to the one on the island. Similar to the one that dragged Juliet to her death.

"They are not dead," Eloise spoke as if reading his mind.

"But they don't exist!" Sawyer shot back, angry.

"Here… They don't exist here. But in the island, it's another business."

"And what can I do to rescue her?" He asked impatiently.

"There's nothing we can do but wait!" Eloise told them. "I know that patience is not one of your strongest suits, Mr. Ford. But comes a time in every man's life that he needs to just sit back and let things happen. You are going to have to be patient you like it or not!"

The old woman walked to a desk and retrieved some papers from the drawer. "Here I want you two to have this." She gave each of them an envelope. "Tomorrow you two must be at LAX early in the morning. And you will need what's inside of those envelopes."

Sawyer opened his and found Juliet's birth certificate among other documents. "Is she coming back in a plane, or something?" Sawyer asked with hope glimmering in his eyes.

"Maybe she will, maybe she won't. It's her choice." Eloise took a long breath. She hated to put doubt in his mind, but he needed to understand and be prepared. "Remember that she was the one who wanted to forget you in the first place. Maybe she doesn't want to remember."

"She will come back to me, I know it!"

"Only time will tell, Mr. Ford." The woman said like a mother comforting her child. "And time hasn't been a really good friend of yours, has it?"

"Time gave me the best three years of my life!" Sawyer said fighting back tears.

"Then let's pray it will be just as kind to you this time around." She smiled kindly, Sawyer could clearly see the pity in her eyes. "You need to be alert for Oceanic flight 815, where everything started, where everything must come to an end."

Sawyer nodded his head and started to leave. But then a thought crossed his mind making him turn around. "If Juliet comes back, her family, will they remember her?" Sawyer missed Juliet more than anything in the whole world, but he remembered how much Juliet used to talk about her sister. Sawyer wouldn't want Juliet to come and not be able to even talk to Rachel.

"If her family really loves her," Eloise answered, "they will remember. Just like you do, Mr. Ford!"

**…END OF FLASHBACK…**

_Con un principio da difendere punto a pieno su noi_

_And we are supposed to defend all the things that makes __us who we are_

They sat in Indian style around the Christmas tree, still wearing pajamas, they hadn't even eaten breakfast. Clementine's excitement about Christmas was contagious; Juliet was smiling from ear to ear. Vincent was resting by the fireplace; JJ was babbling and playing with the wrapping paper on the floor; and Clementine was unwrapping the biggest box from the tree.

"Oh, my God!" Clementine shrieked happily when she looked at the unwrapped present. "I wanted this doll so much!!!" She hugged and kissed the box. Her little world was at piece now.

"Wow, Clem, that's a big doll you got there!" Juliet said still smiling.

"Look, auntie Juliet," Clementine showed her the doll, "she says mummy, cries, pees and poops!"

"You know? I have a little doll that does the same thing." The two of them looked over at JJ. "Right, JJ?"

"Mamma!" The baby said and babbled some more.

"But the bad thing is that I can never put him away when I'm done playing with him." Clementine giggled.

"Ok, Cheshire cat," Sawyer said to Juliet. "There's still a present left under the Christmas tree. And now that I know how much trouble my kids are to you, why don't we open it quickly so I can make you pay for what you said by trying to make more babies?!"

Juliet rolled her eyes, and picked up the last present. "It's another one for Clementine." She said making the girl smile excitedly.

**…FLASHBACK…**

_E lasciati guardare un po di più come un bagliore splendi di rivoluzione tu_

_Let people look at you, like a spa__rkle you shine in a revolution._

Juliet walked alone through the corridors inside the statue. The place was oddly familiar to her, as if she had seen it before, maybe in her dreams. She was feeling completely scared, she was taught to fear Jacob, and for a long time, she hadn't believed he really existed. In fact, she was only sure of his presence that exact day when she found him weaving a beautiful tapestry inside his statue.

But nothing prepared her for the shock of when he looked up from his work to stare straight into her eyes.

"Dad?!" She asked surprised.

"Hey, Julie!" He smiled warmly.

Jacob explained to her everything that she always wanted to know. He told her that he had build the statue to protect the pregnant woman. And when his brother Esau destroyed the statue the mothers began to die. But look at what life had given him: A daughter who could make miracles happen, just like the statue.

He also told her that when she set off the bomb she managed not only to save his life, but she also destroyed Esau. Juliet didn't know what to make of all this information. All this time she had believed she was dragged into this mess, and now she just found out she was the key to solve all their problems.

Her problems!

"Honey, did you learn from your mistakes?" He asked after a long silence.

"What?" She asked confused.

"That the human race is cruel." He said calmly. "That they hurt you, they manipulate you, claim you as if you were and object, mark you like a cattle. That the human race will abuse of power, and make all kinds of atrocities."

"Yes..." She agreed. "But those are just some people. The human race is also capable of caring, of helping the ones in need, of having feelings, of loving!"

Jacob looked away disappointed at her answer. "I will let you go back, if you want, Juliet." He then trained his eyes on his daughter. "But I want you to stay here with me, where nobody could ever hurt you again."

"I love someone out there, dad!" She explained. "And I will risk getting hurt again, if it means I can see his face one more time!"

Jacob sighed. "It's your choice." He held her face in his hands adoringly and kissed her forehead like he used to do when she was a little girl. "I hope you keep making miracles happen in world outside, my angel!"

"I will, dad," she said close to tears and hugged him. She had missed him so much.

When Juliet went outside she told everyone the good news, that it was all over, and that they were finally going home. Hurley and Jack were celebrating, Richard smiled happy for them.

"Dr. Burke," Walt said, "I'm going to stay on the island."

"Oh," was her reaction!

"I like it here!" He smiled. "Can I ask you a favor?"

"Sure, Walt. Anything."

"Will you take care of Vincent?" She looked at him confused. "He seems to like you, and he really misses canned food for dogs!" She laughed and agreed to take Vincent.

------------

_Ed io... Sarò di più, io sarò la certezza che chiedevi tu._

_And me... I'll be more, I'll be the certainty of which you have questioned._

Sawyer waited impatiently at the airport pacing around like a mad man. Kate watched him from the place she was sitting at. Sawyer's anxiety hit its peak when they heard the announcement that Oceanic flight 815 had landed safely. The two of them waited by the gate, watching the many unfamiliar faces pass them by.

And then he saw her, her hair was down, wavy like it used to be when they didn't live on the seventies and she hadn't the luxury of shampoo and blow dryer. Sawyer's heart stopped, and then when she smiled at him, his heart raced to the point that he thought he would have a heart attack.

It looked like an airport scene from chickflicks, she came running towards him and he hugged her for dear life. The sensation of her body close to his felt like heaven. She was there, flesh and bones. She was alive. Juliet started to cry in his arms, Sawyer couldn't stop his own tears from falling.

"I've missed you, Blondie!" He said into her ears.

"Me too!"

"Duuuuuuuuude!" They heard Hurley approaching, Juliet let go of Sawyer for them to have their man hug.

Juliet saw Kate and Jack breaking apart from their embrace. Jack moved to speak to Sawyer and Kate's eyes fell on Juliet's. They stood awkward for a moment and then they hugged each other quickly.

Then Juliet's eyes fell on a little boy who couldn't be older than three years old. He looked lost, searching the crowd for someone. His eyes were sparkling with desperate tears. Juliet kneeled down before him to be in his eye level.

"Are you lost, little guy?" Juliet asked to what he nodded his head uncertain. Afraid of her for being a stranger.

"Julian!" She heard a woman calling from behind her. "There you are!"

Juliet got up and watched them amazed. The woman picked her son and was holding him desperately, trying to calm herself. "You gave mummy quite a scare!" She said shakly, she then looked over at the woman in front of her. "Thanks," she told Juliet. "I was picking my luggage, one minute he was there the other he just wasn't."

"Rachel?" Juliet asked intrigued that her sister was acting like she was a complete stranger.

For a moment, Rachel stared at her trying to figure out where she knew her from. And then Rachel remembered it all. "Juliet?"

They shrieked contently like they used to do when they were a couple of school girls. They hugged next, Juliet began to cry for the second time in five minutes. Rachel was crying as well, they were all tears of happiness. Julian was the only one who didn't enjoy it at all for he was being smothered between their hug.

**…END OF FLASHBACK…**

_Lascia il tuo passato com'è lo porterai insieme a me nel tuo presente._

_Let your past __as it is and bring it close to me in your present._

JJ was now playing with Vincent's tail as Clementine unwrapped her last present. Sawyer smiled at her reaction when she opened up the box. She started crying out with happiness!

"It's a bunny!" She told them, Sawyer and Juliet shared a smile the girl cradled the little blue eyed white bunny in her arms.

"Oh, man!" Sawyer complained jokingly. "I said no bunnies!"

"It's a mini lop, do you like it?" Juliet asked.

"Of course I like it!" Clementine said excited. "Is it a boy or a girl?"

"A boy, honey!" Juliet answered.

"Then I'll call him Jake!" Sawyer and Juliet exchanged knowingly glances. "Can I keep him, daddy?"

"Of course you can, peanut!" He said, she got up and kissed him on the cheeks. Then Clementine ran to the phone to call her mother and tell her the good news. Sawyer looked at Juliet, who still had a silly smile on her face like the Cheshire cat. "It's all about bunnies, anyway!" He told her and kissed her on the lips.


	4. Epilogue

**Epilogue – ****In the Gardens know one knows of**

_Sorreggili, aiutali, ti prego non lasciarli cadere. __Esili, fragili, non negargli un po' del tuo amore!_

_Support them, help them, I beg you not to let them fall. They are exiled, weak, don't deny them a little bit of love! _

_(Laura Pausini – Nei giardini che nessuno sa – Singer picked by Laís)_

This was the beautiful love story of Juliet and Sawyer. Juliet was born with a gift, she created life where life wasn't supposed to be. But she was the pretty girl with a broken smile, she had a sad past. But she took all the bad things that happened to her and she learned from her mistakes. When life gave her lemons she made a lemonade. And she got strong. She just needed to spread her wings and learn to fly.

_She dreams of laughter in the rain she says it's her favorite sound.__ She dreams of plastic parents that would never let her down._

_(Lifehouse – Buterfly – Band picked by D.D. Casale)_

And Juliet had a destiny, she was sent to a mysterious island, where horrible things happened. She was important to that place. She just didn't know then, that the island was important to her as well. It was there where she met Sawyer. She always called him James. They hated each other at first. But then after almost dying together in a time travelling experience they became close friends. They had a pretty good like in the seventies. Where they had picnics in beautiful cliffs, and one day they even made love under waterfall.

_My favorite thing that drives me wild is when a city girl walks a country mile for a boy she loves, God bless the child inside the girls of summer._

_(Aerosmith – Girls of Summer – Band picked by Priiscila)_

But things are almost never easily, especially for this couple. Just after the day Sawyer gave her a beautiful daisy, their friends came back, and it ruined the lovely and peaceful life they used to have. Jack wanted to blow up the island, Kate didn't want to go back to the start, and Sawyer wanted to buy Microsoft! And in the wrong moment when Sawyer looked at Kate, Juliet changed her mind and decided she wanted to forget.

_Then all at once you have to say goodbye wondering__ "could you stay my love? Will you wake up by my side?"_

_(John Mayer - Dreaming with a broken heart – __Singer picked by Rutinha)_

And then everything was a hurry, there was shooting, there were people yelling. And when the drill hit the pocket of energy, everything metal started to get sucked into the hole of the Swan Station, the place where all things led to, like John once said. Metal chains wrapped around Juliet waist, dragging her down. Sawyer didn't want her to let go, _he was strong but the force was stronger_. And Juliet cried out that she loved him, she repeated a few times and let go of him before she dragged Sawyer with her. She set off the bomb!

_My silence solidifies, until that hollow void erases you so I can't feel at all.__ But if I never feel again, at least that nothingness will end the painful dream, of you and me..._

_(Missy Higgins – The Sound Of White – __Singer picked by Series Addict aka Polly)_

But Juliet didn't really want to forget Sawyer, she was just tired of hurting. People had always hurt her, and she never learned how to deal with them. But she understood that was what people did, they hurt the ones they loved the most. Juliet woke up on the island, she found out she didn't exist anymore. Neither did Walt, Jack and Hurley. They never understood quite as well why such thing happened.

But when she had a heart to heart with her father - who turned out to be Jacob - he explained to her that they, much like her, were special to the island. He asked her to make a choice; stay on the island with him where no one could ever hurt her again; or go back to the real world and make miracles happen. She chose Love.

_But we leave the sound on 'cause silence is harder__. And no one's the killer and no one's the martyr. The world that has made us can no longer contain us._

_(Regina Spektor – The Consequence of Sounds – Singer picked by Mari B.)_

Walt chose to stay, he wanted to become a hero, be Jacob's apprentice. And though he loved his dog Vincent, he knew the island wasn't a place for a dog. He wanted Vincent to be with a real family, and he knew Juliet needed the company, so he asked her to take care of him. And so Juliet, Jack, Hurley and Vincent took the Temple Express, walked into a door in the mysterious Temple, and reappeared on the other side. On a plane, not any flight, it was Oceanic flight 815.

At the airport she was finally reunited with Sawyer and they made up. She was also reunited with her sister and met her nephew Julian. Next thing you know Sawyer and Juliet are getting married and making babies. JJ was born early in the morning, it stands for Joshua James. James after his father's name, of course, and because Juliet thought that it sounded like J'aime, which means "I love" in French. And Joshua because Sawyer liked the name Josh, he didn't know why exactly.

_Nasceu meu rebento, não era o momento dele rebentar. Já foi nascendo com cara de fome e eu não tinha nem nome prá lhe dar._

_And then my son was born, when he wasn't supposed to.__ But he came nonetheless, already hungry for life, I didn't even know what name to give him._

_(Chico Buarque – O Meu Guri – __Singer picked by Mari __Emmy)_

Sawyer then called Cassidy, he said he wanted to be a father to Clementine. They bought a big house in Pennsylvania, the place where Clementine thought that pencils grew on trees. The house was rusty at some places and very old looking, but was really beautiful. The house was the prettiest thing, the place where they raised their family, and Clementine came to spend the holidays. Especially Christmas!

The prettiest thing I ever did see

Was dusty as the handle on the door

Rusty as a nail stuck in the old pine floor

Looks like home to me

_(Norah Jones – The prettiest thing – __Singer picked by Aline)_

* * *

**Author's Note: **The epilogue is not as long as the other chapters, I wrote this because I wanted to use one song from each artist that was picked by all the people involved in the Secret Santa.

So, this is it, I hope you guys liked it! Thanks for reading, and Happy New Year!


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